The Thing with Quality Time

It's funny how people seem to think that they have spent quality time with their kids after work by bringing them out to the mall for a lifeless and meaningless stroll only to come home with nothing more than a whole bunch of stuff that they (or the kids) don't need. In fact, time has been wasted because kids don't NEED you to bring them out to the shopping mall to waste time. They want and NEED to be with you.

It's really funny because I used to think taking my kids out for a very casual window-shopping trip was meaningful too until someone pointed out to me that my kids were STILL closer to someone else (their daycaregiver) when compared to me. I mean, what is it with kids, anyway? I take them out, don't I? I try my best to give them whatever they want. I buy them presents, don't I? They have more clothes than me, don't they?

But here's the sad part?.that's not quality time.

Quality time with your kids is just staying home with absolutely nothing to do, just lolling around on the carpet watching 'Blue's Clues' or 'Sesame Street' together giving each other nonchalant kisses and exchanging hugs (and repeated reviews about the show). Spending quality time with the kids involve nothing more than just CONNECTING with the kids, not spending detached moments of dis-connectivity loitering through unfamiliar places. It's about spending time connecting with the kids when you KNOW you've GOT SOMETHING ELSE BETTER TO DO.

I spent one whole Friday thinking about what to do with the kids on Saturday and Sunday and end up with nothing. So, on the weekends, we spent hours in front of the TV coloring bananas, gorillas, and calculator on pieces of paper. We, then, took the bicycle to the park and cycled around. Joshua got scrapes on his knees and Jared was more than unhappy with the fact that his big brother made more 'sand castles' in the park than he did ? but we all came home knowing that we knew each other better.

You see, spending quality time with the kids is all about getting to know your kids. Making an effort to be there for them when you know you CAN be doing something else with your life. We know we can use that time to actually finish off the report or call that important client up ? but the most important thing with quality time with kids is that we DON'T.

© Marsha Maung 2005
Please feel free to reprint this article anywhere in your website, magazine, ezine, or other types of publications for free. Please note that you should keep the byline in tact and please provide links back to the web addresses provided in the byline. Thanks.

Marsha Maung is a freelance graphic designer and copy writer who works from home. She designs apparel and premium items at http://www.creativejooz.com and http://www.allmomstuff.com and is the author of "Raising little magicians", and the popular "The Lance in freelancing". More information can be found at http://www.marshamaung.com

Examiner.com
Parenting Examiner
Examiner.com - 1 hour ago
Gayle Trent is a work-from-home wife and mother. Besides caring for her twelve-year-old boy/girl twins, she works as a freelance writer and author. ...
Video: Moms React To Palin Selection kcratv
The Blogosphere reacts to Palin's selection Anchorage Daily News (subscription)
all 6,191 news articles

Denver rules: A guide to parenting, the Democratic Convention way
Globe and Mail, Canada - 6 hours ago
"Kids," I said, in the gentle, wise, mentoring way that a parent should speak to a child. "I've been listening to the Democrats give speeches. ...

findingDulcinea
Parenting Gets a Boost With Online Nanny Program
findingDulcinea, New York - 32 minutes ago
by Lindsey Chapman A new Web site helps parents and kids make sure household chores are completed—minus the nagging. The Washington Post calls the Web site ...

Examiner.com
Parenting Examiner
Examiner.com - 1 hour ago
Gayle Trent is a work-from-home wife and mother. Besides caring for her twelve-year-old boy/girl twins, she works as a freelance writer and author. ...

Taming Hollywood trends
Edmonton Sun,  Canada - 4 hours ago
Parents need to discuss the message being sent by clothing choices and how clothing may be creating an incorrect message, says parenting expert Alyson ...

Waseca County News
Struggles of single parenting
Waseca County News, MN - 12 hours ago
Bjerklie’s parents, who live in Bjerklie’s hometown of Fergus Falls, Minn., have a tight-knit relationship with Hannah, and Bjerklie also has brothers who ...

What it takes to be a good parent in today’s culture
The Prairie Star, MT - 13 hours ago
Quality of parenting is declining. It is not just the environment but the quality of parenting that is causing the difficulty. The decline in society can be ...

Boston Globe
For mothers in prison, children can be key to rehabilitation, with ...
Boston Globe, United States - Aug 27, 2008
Although the report, "Parenting from Prison: Family Relationships of Incarcerated Women in Massachusetts," found that progress has been made in recent years ...

Farah Hospital hosts Jordan’s Pioneering Parenting Program
Al-Bawaba, Jordan - Aug 27, 2008
Farah Hospital, Jordan’s leading hospital specializing in fertility, recently hosted and for the second consecutive time Jordan’s leading parenting program ...

Take Back Your Family:
Globe and Mail, Canada - 4 hours ago
Yes, Take Back Your Family is just that - a how-to guide for today's parents. With chapters like "Run Your Family Like a Business," Run and his wife, ...

Raising Boys

The last decade has seen heightened interest in and awareness of the issues surrounding boys... Read More

Childrens Friendships Made Easy

Most research into children's friendships shows that those children who are able to form friendships... Read More

Top Five Ways To Stay In Touch With Your Child

Once your little boy/girl goes off to school, you may find that your "special talks"... Read More

How to Talk to Your Kids About Suicide: New Study Says it May Make Them Less Likely to Consider It!

This year alone, 1,600 teenagers aged 15 to 19 will die from committing suicide. Suicide... Read More

Why Scrapbooking Moms are the Secret Weapon in the War on Terror

There is a front line and a back end to every successful war effort. Rosie... Read More

Bless Your Child With The Name

What a dreamer I am when thinking about parenthood. Most of the time, I do... Read More

Sibling Fighting - Reduce Sibling Rivalry by NOT Keeping Score

Recently, a much-anticipated game of mini-golf with my children soon turned into a disaster. There... Read More

Hair Care for Children

Salon visits can be scary experiences for small children: They are boring, full of strangers... Read More

Registering a Birth in Scotland

Who Can Register A Birth? The child's mother or father should register the... Read More

PG Rating Isnt What It Used To Be

If there are any parents reading this who are thinking of taking their under-10 year... Read More